tuju ku kehilangan

hari2 semakin gelap
aku tak nampak di mana cahaya
ohh tidak aku kegelapan
ke mana perginya sinar hari2ku?

terpusing aku ke sana sini
meraba raba dalam kelam
mencari sesuatu yang boleh aku genggam
yang boleh berdampingku
yang boleh menemaniku
tanpa ragu2 tanpa hirau birau
tetapi kegagalan demi kegagalan ku tempuh

ohh tuhan aku kehilangan
kehilangan sesuatu yang aku telah ada
aku semakin kekurangan
kekurangan kekuatan hati
untuk menempuh duka lara
sepertimana hari2 yang dulu

ohh tuhan ke mana harus aku pergi?
teraba aku dalam gelap
detik demi detik sinar tidak ku temu
apakah aku terperangkap di sini selamanya?
apakah datang sang puteri menjauhkan aku dari kegelapan?
apakah aku tiada peluang bertemu cahaya?

hari ini aku tertunduk
terduduk
terasa aku mahu pergi
pergi jauh bersendiri
membawa hati yang hampa
meninggalkan dunia ke alam maya
mencari ketenangan yang tak mungkin ku jumpa
mencari erti hidup seorang yang hampa

hari esok aku akan berdiri
melangkah setapak demi detapak
menuju ke tiada arah tuju
berjalan dan terus berjalan
berlalu pergi
pergi berjalan kaki
berjalan bersendiri

aku pejalan kaki
ingin meninggalkan semua ini
semua...

the 081217

hening pagi yang sunyi
aku terjaga bersendiri
terdiam melihat lelangit
mengira bintang di dalam hati

deruan kipas terdengar
menemani sunyiku mendingin tubuhku
di saat aku mula mengenang
potret memori luka di hati

hilang aku dalam memori
meniti hari yang jauh berlalu
apa guna aku ke situ?
mahukah aku mengulang yang itu?

kelam dalam suram
pada pagi hari
sebelum tebit fajar mentari
aku hilang dalam memoir hati

keluarkan aku
jauhkan aku dari nostalgia itu
aku dah penat
tak sanggup mengulangi kesilapan itu

oh tuhan hidupkanlah hati
untuk aku kembali berseri
sesungguhnya hatiku mati
ditelan kesalahan diri

tidak perlu aku kembali
mengubah yang dahulu kala
cuma aku perlu bangkit
mengubah yang bakal datang

nasibku hidupku semua pada aku
silap selangkah silaplah jalan
aku tak boleh lalai lagi
maaf cinta aku mahu pergi

membuka minda dan hati baru
mencoret ceritera baru
menjadi tugas baru aku
untuk menawan hati yang salju

the last goodbye

looking around the mess i made
it's me the one to be blamed
though me and you make things beautiful
yet been marked by my own fools

people make mistakes but mine are unacceptable
neither one can forget them never
i'll take whatever heading my way
as i know it wasn't you

i'll not winning you whole back as i see
you deserve far better than me
i'll stab my heart kill my pride for you
i'll surrender everything i got all for you

they're keep saying and i know their truth
all i want i the best for you
yet the breakaway is too hard i know
but baby just let it go you leave them slow

this is my last goodbye
will not be back no matter how hard you cry
wipe your tears as you're too good for my life and me
you'll see the life goes on when there's no you and me

i'll make sure you're living happily
i'll make for you everything smoothly

this is my all
this is my life goodbye

all i ever wanted

since it began for me
expectations are on sky high
never it was too long for me
to be down against the expecting

never a second give me a life
and it's hard to survive
because you i think my whole life
but i just living out in the jive

all i ever wanted is you
all i wanted is just you
all i wanted is your care
all i wanted is your love

oh how can i ever got that
i speak the standard too high
or is it just you who can't afford it

all i ever wanted is you
all i wanted is just you
all i wanted is your care
all i wanted is your love

oh how can i ever love you
i just can accept the way you are
or am i just too heartbroken the way life is

please baby you're always mine
but it just the way i see you see me
i never feel like i'm yours at that way
you got to do something right away

please baby show me all you got
gimme your laugh and smile
and everything making you sad and mad
cause i'm way too much want that from you

all i ever wanted is you
all i wanted is just you
all i wanted is your care
all i wanted is your love

oh how can i ever got that
i speak the standard too high
or is it just you who can't afford it

all i ever wanted is you
all i wanted is just you
all i wanted is your care
all i wanted is your love

oh how can i ever love you
i just can accept the way you are
or am i just too heartbroken the way life is